May We Contact Your Former Relationships?

May We Contact Your Former Relationships?

While filling out pages upon pages of paperwork for my new job, I had to discuss former employers and if my new company could contact them.  Concurrently, I was also texting a friend of mine who may have been a romantic interest at one point, but after knowing more and more about her I knew it would not work.  Then it hit me.  Wouldn’t it be great we could contact the past relationships of others?

Think about it.  It is kind of an interesting concept.  You could get on the phone and call two of their ex’s and see what happened.  “She was flaky,” “I was a jerk and he deserved better,” “I honestly can say it ended on great note.”  You could get a sense of the person and what happens when the honeymoon phase ends.

Then I thought about what my ex’s would say.  When we have to list former employers, we know who we want our next job to contact – and we know which employers should be left off anything that connects us to them.  It would have to be the same with our ex’s.  I know I have ones that I would love to use as a recommendation, and others that I would not anyone talking to for a variety of reasons.

This thought train kept moving as I reflected on why some of the past girls I would cringe if anyone talked to them.  Sure, some of the past relationships were volatile, and often not my fault.  But then the ones that were.  The ones I took for granted, the ones I was too fickle with, or the ones that I failed to recognize were perfect for the man I was, not the man I thought I was.

Would it help relationships?  Or is part of the fun figuring things out; seeing what the good and bad really are?  Would speaking with an ex almost stain the relationship before it even began?  I think it would.  Maybe it’s a good thing only businesses can contact former businesses, because part of the joy of falling for someone is seeing all of them in a new light, for the first time.


Now what?

A year.  For over 365 days, I have not added, uploaded, commented, or done anything with this site.  What a failure on my part.  For the limited followers I have, I apologize. But it has been a pretty intense year.

Two major life changes happened.  After an amazing nine years, I decided to leave the military and head back to Colorado.  It was one of the toughest decisions I had to make.  The Air Force was the only thing I knew.  I breathed it.  To leave something that was so second nature to me was difficult and frightening.  Most ask, why did I leave?  I am a faithful Catholic, and I felt that the Lord was calling me to discern the Catholic Priesthood by entering seminary.  I packed up everything in Florida and headed west, to start a new life.

Major life change number two.  I left seminary after one year.  I loved the year I was there, but through the experience I felt like I was missing something.  Throughout prayer and discernment, I closed the door to the priesthood and left in June.

Now we come to the topic of the post, now what?

I am in my thirties and have no idea what I want to do with my life.  When I wove the image of my future I never thought I would be here.  Even when I envisioned my future five years ago everything seemed so certain.  However, I sit here typing and am trying to figure out how I got here.  What the heck is going to happen to me and where am I going to go?

So, this is where the blog is going to go.  This is its “new direction.”  I am going to chronicle my life and let you watch and see what I see.  I promise there will be humor, travel, heartbreak, and discovery.  Therefore, we are starting this blog over.  New life.  New start.

Thanks for coming along.  This world is not so scary when you have people with you.